Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
