How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Success! We fucked roommates!
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
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