Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Randomize
