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• (309): View more from Illinois

  $35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.

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• (425): View more from Washington

  Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.

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• (907): View more from Alaska

  I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.

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  Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July

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• (605): View more from South Dakota

  You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.

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• (731): View more from Tennessee

  You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.

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• (+61): View more from Australia

  we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood

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• (541): View more from Oregon

  It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.

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• (985): View more from Louisiana

  My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.

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  19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced

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• (807): View more from Ontario

  It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.

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• (408): View more from California

  Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.

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• (209): View more from California

  and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow

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• (937): View more from Ohio

  Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.

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• (918): View more from Oklahoma

  Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit

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• (512): View more from Texas

  Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.

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