You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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