please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
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