ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Randomize
