it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
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