Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Randomize
