on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
