you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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