They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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