she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
