Your tits are I can't wait for
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
