You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
Randomize
