Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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