She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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