We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
