Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Randomize