Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
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You dont lie about slip and slides
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
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you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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