wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
23 Fathers Confess The Best Way They’ve Messed With Their Daughter’s Boyfriend
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
25 Children of Helicopter Parents Admit The Most Horrible Thing They Were Put Through
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.