Its about making memories worth repressing
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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