He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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