I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
bring money and cleavage
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
last night I used snow as a chaser
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize
