Is it normal to miss your booty call?
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
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