ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
