Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
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