But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Randomize
