That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
