She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
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