seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
That accounts for only three of the penises
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
