I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize