At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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