I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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