I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
