Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Randomize
