Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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