butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Randomize
