afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
