the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Randomize
