And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
