Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
