i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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