Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
smell my finger.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Randomize
