Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize