i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
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