D3 body, D1 cock
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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