She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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