I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize