College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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